Susan's Legal Bits

In June 2009 Susan was interested in.....

....Stress at Work

Hello All,

No heavy law type topics for me this month but something perhaps much more sinister that can affect us all without us realising....Stress at Work.

Just last week I had lengthy phone calls with two different employees of ours about horrible situations they were experiencing at their client's workplace and, in both cases, their first words to me were 'what should I do ?' and 'who can I sue?'

Of course there are several laws that can protect people from being discriminated against, harassed, bullied and victimised but, as I said above, I wish for once to leave the law alone (I can always come back to this later if anyone wants to contact me direct on a particular situation).

Instead I want to suggest a course of action when you come across that annoying colleague or irritating boss and that is to "control, remove, reflect and react".

"Control" of an immediate nerves-heightened ,adrenaline-pumping situation is key to ensuring no more damage is done and the situation is not escalated. If the other person is not as self-aware as you then it will require you to be the one to stop the conversation. Never try to 'control' someone else - either physically or mentally - just focus on controling yourself and you may be surprised at how many others follow your lead over time.

"Remove" is the physical action of closing the situation down Deep breathing out in the hallway or even in the loo and putting things into perspective is a much better technique than arranging (when still angry) to see a lawyer, the Citizens Advice Bureau or going round someone's house with a baseball bat !. The threshold level before irritation sparks (or someone sees red with rage) is different for everyone, but when times are tough and we have perhaps just heard that our hubby or sister has been made redundant and fear the worst for ourselves too, those thresholds suddenly dip lower than a limbo pole on an 18-30's holiday. You therefore may be surprised at how the smallest thing now triggers your stress button....adjust your control accordingly.

"Reflect" is that time where we consider what just happened - We have to be aware of our own reactions, whether they are really in proportion to what has just happened or whether they might just be a sign of the times and what else is going on in our lives. We perhaps have to be a little more understanding of the reactions of others towards us - how are we to know if that strange 'know it all' in the office has just suffered a family loss and that might be why he just snapped at me because I asked a question. Remember also that here is a good time to talk things through with trusted sources - things get put into perspective sometimes quicker with an outsider's input.

"React" - After reflecting and putting things into perspective it is the time to go back and address whatever the situation was in the beginning. Starting the conversation with a neutral tone of voice - calm and controlled. Be prepared to listen at all times and continue with the point that you need to make.

Lastly RELAX. Take some time to really forget about work. Walk, Cycle, play competitive sports, go bird-watching - anything that requires you to stop thinking about the negative issue you had to deal with last week. Put it to bed because you did your best.

So, in conclusion, we all have to work together (fact of life unless that lottery win comes up I guess) and conflict is possible everywhere. However, if we can only manage our stress levels a little better, treat ourselves with kindness and work towards treating others with respect no matter what, we may just have a chance of getting through this recession with our dignity and social skills intact.

I hope you all have a good month, remember that if you ever do have a serious issue with one of your clients please don't hesitate to contact me for immediate advice.

To give Susan your suggestions and comments you can get in touch with her here.

All comments provided on my blog are for informational purposes only. My thoughts and opinions are my own with agreement from my employer as being suitable for sharing with the wider world. Any advice, or writing that might be taken as advice, should not be deemed in any way as professional Legal advice and are only the musings of a HR practioner whose sole aim is to help where she can.